A few weeks ago you turned 4. I am amazed every day at the little sweetness of your soul. You no longer fit in with the babies; you are definitely a "big girl" now. You follow #1 and #2 down to the woods all the time and try and do everything they are doing. When we homeschool, you sit there with a little book and "write" and complain that "this is sooo hard!" When I sit and read with you (which you would do ALL day if I could) your little mind and imagination open up and you are so quick to observe things and learn all you can. Even at this young age I can see that you will have a tendency towards perfectionism. Sometimes you will draw a beautiful picture, but when I tell you how beautiful it is, you will point out a mistake you made that really bothers you. While perfectionism may be a hardship in things like drawing and school, I'm sure it will help you, in some way, become the woman God has created you to be.
You love St. Therese and Mary are constantly offering "little sacrifices". You shock your father and I with your natural tendencies towards God and the greater good. If there is a toy you want that Sarah wants also, you will say, "I guess I'll make a little sacrifice" and let Sarah play with the toy. You often make little sacrifices for your older siblings too. When we pass graveyards you always say we need to pray and sometimes you randomly want to pray for things that "pop" into your head. The random things you tell me sometimes about God and the things you think about are humbling and amazing. One day in mass you leaned over and said, "Mommy, God is everything and we are nothing. That is what I always think about." Another time you told me, "Mommy, all God wants is for us to love him a lot, pray and make little sacrifices. I know that because He taught me that." Saying things like this and thinking about these things comes so naturally for you and I hope that never stops.
You are still the sweet and quiet calmness of this family. While you don't just sit back and take being bullied by the older children, you are much calmer and less easily upset than anyone in the family. We could all learn a lot from you. You are extremely sensitive and can easily cry if I even speak a harsh word to you. You still love to climb up on my lap and cuddle. I hope that doesn't stop anytime soon.
Jules, you bring so much joy to this family it is hard to put into words. I thank God everyday that you are here. I am so blessed and unworthy to be your mother and I'm sorry for all the times I have failed you. My prayer for you is that you always stay as close to Jesus as you are now. I pray that the world doesn't steel your sweet, sensitive spirit and that you grow to be a Godly woman. Thank you for teaching ME how to love Jesus each and everyday. I love you sweet daughter.
Alive not Dead: an Adventure through Life
2 years ago