The Things They Say (5)

After explaining to Peanut how his friend got a baby brother I asked, "If mommy and daddy have a new baby, do you want a brother or a sister"
Peanut: "Hmmm...a baby brother AND a baby sister"
Me:  "Well if you just had to choose one would it be a brother or sister?"
Peanut: "Hmmm....GREEN!"
(When Peanut doesn't know the answer to questions he usually spits a random color out. Pretty cute and funny!)

Me: "Please don't step in the flower bed"
Peanut: "Ok..." (Long pensive pause) "Mama? Who sleeps in the flowers?!!?"

Peanut has recently entered the "Why, Mommy?" stage. It's just as lovely as everyone describes it...you would be amazed at how many of our conversations end in "Because that's how God created it". Not because I am using this as an out, but because I have seriously answered so many "Why?"s that it really is the only answer left. This evening I tried something different on our drive to Target:

Peanut: "Why do all the lights turn on, Mama?"
Me: "So you can see the signs when it gets dark"
Peanut: "But why, mama?"
Me (trying something new): "Well, why not?"
Peanut: "NO! You know how to answer me that question! Now behave!"

Geez...won't try that one again!

The Man I DON'T Want My Daughter To Marry

My birthday was this week. I asked for an ipod to listen to Catholic Answers on while I do my housework (kids napping of course). Since we are a little lot short on cash these days, my husband ventured to Craigslist to find a gently used one. He found one for a decent deal and met the seller to pick it up. He was a fourteen year old high school student who apologized to my husband that he hadn't deleted his music from the ipod before selling it. When my husband came home, gave it to me and explained his music was still on there, curiosity got the best of me. Of course, I started scrolling through the music this kid listened to. I didn't actually listen to the music, just read the titles. That was enough for me. Some are too dirty to even post on this blog, but among some of the worst were:

Miss Me, Kiss Me, Lick Me

Go Hard in the Paint

How Do You Want It?

Homegirl Dirty

Teach Me How To Jerk

Ink My Whole Body

Ice Cream Paint Job

He was FOURTEEN, people! Excuse me while I puke. How can we expect men to treat women well if they are constantly filling their heads with this crap (oh gosh, I sound like my mother!)? Are we really surprised when women are beaten, raped and sometimes killed when they are treated like nothing more than sexual objects? Why aren't parents paying attention to the music their kids listen to? 

My husband and I often talk about what we will say and do the first time our daughter brings a boy home. All of the scenarios we have come up with went flying out the window tonight. Now I KNOW what my first question will be..."Excuse me, if you want to date my daughter, I'm going to need to see your ipod first". 

For now, I think I will just dunk the thing in holy water and pray it doesn't break in the process...

The Baby to Be

My sister is having a baby. I'm beyond overjoyed about this (you have no idea). I can't help looking at newborn baby girl clothes at every store I walk in to. Unfortunately, for numerous reasons, I won't be able to make her baby shower. But that doesn't mean I didn't venture out for a gift. Tonight I went to Target and started looking for a card to send for her shower.

Couldn't find one.

Do you know why? Because every single flippin' card I picked up said something like this..."Congratulations to you and your baby to be!" BABY TO BE?!?!?! What the!?!? What in the world, if not a baby, has been kicking my sister's ribs the last few weeks, causing her to pee every two seconds and probably occupying her every thought? A "baby to be" apparently. What does that even mean? Baby to be. It's a baby right now, Hallmark! She's just covered up by human skin in a little sack. Did you not take Biology 101? She has her own human DNA, a heartbeat, legs, arms, ten fingers and toes and everything else that physically constitutes us as human beings. Not "almost" human beings.

I must have looked like an idiot searching for cards. My other option was to get one that said, "Congratulations on the birth of your daughter!" The doula in me comes out. Tears start flowing. So one minute I'm picking up a card that makes me cry and the next I'm picking up one that makes me so frustrated I'm slamming it shut and angrily shoving it back in it's place. Surely I was the bipolar mother who just didn't get enough sleep to those around me. Maybe I should write a letter to Hallmark. Maybe it would start something like this:

Dear Hallmark,
Does this look like a "Baby to Be" to you?

Unspoken Truth

Every evening we take our children to the park before bed time. On Wednesday I ventured out myself because my husband had dental surgery and couldn't come. It gave me the opportunity to have a discussion with a woman I probably otherwise wouldn't have. We talked about motherhood, being military and a whole bunch of things. Somewhere in the conversation religion came up. She shared with me that if she had one wish for her son it would be not to raise him in naivety like her parents raised her. She was raised in a Christian church and sheltered from all other religions. She went on to share that she no longer attends any church, and when her son is old enough she will take him to all churches and let him decide for himself what, if anything, he wishes to believe in.

This isn't the first time I have met parents with this mind set. I think they have very good and honest intentions in raising their kids this way, but I think they don't realize the unspoken truth they are teaching their children by doing this. Children are these little blank slates we fill and color with our teachings. They don't come out of the womb knowing how the world works and how to respond to certain situations. We teach them that. Yes, we have a heart made for Christ but who directs the heart there? The parents. We also have a strong tendency towards sin. When we send our children into the world saying, "here, explore everything and find what works for you" we are really saying, "There is no truth. Nothing worth believing in, fighting for or loving. All paths lead to the same end." The common belief in today's world of cultural relativism is doing nothing more than confusing hearts that were made for Truth; and one Truth at that.

This conversation, of course, got me to thinking about my own upbringing. My parents never sheltered me from other religions. They didn't encourage me to go to any church I wanted either, but I knew what others believed. And when I did venture out as a teenager to explore other belief systems my parents were always there to answer EVERY question I had about my Catholic faith. If they didn't know the answer, we looked it up together. It wasn't about brainwashing me to believe whatever they believed in, it was about seeking truth. Finding what logically and contextually made sense. How many people do you know that have left the Catholic faith simply because there was no one there to answer the questions they had? Sadly, I know plenty. But this is why I continue to try and learn my faith and seek out Truth in all questions that arise in life. So that one day, I can answer those questions for my own children. My wish for them is that they grow up knowing that truth in this messed up world does exist and that He is worth living for.

The Bad Blogger...and An Update on Miss Belle

So, first of all, sorry for being a bad blogger these last few months. I know I don't update my blog nearly enough, but sometimes there just isn't much time or content to write about. And I don't want to bore you with my day to day activities, because trust me, they would bore you (not saying they bore me, but they would bore you).  If you are still reading this scarcely updated blog, thanks for sticking around for the ride. I really do appreciate it!

Miss Belle fell in the bathroom last week and cracked one of her teeth in half. Of course it was her upper front tooth. You know, the one that shows every time she smiles? The one she uses every time she bites into food? Yeah, that one. Why that one!??! My husband and I aren't sure this girl will make it till she is five. Seriously, she has no fear, and at eighteen months has already broken her leg and is about to have major dental surgery. I rushed her to the dentist that day. The dentist said it's about as bad as it can be. She needs a baby root canal (another phrase I never thought I would hear), and will have to be put under general anesthesia. Yikes! Talk about scary. It seems to be our only option, besides pulling her tooth which could affect her speech and ability to eat. Not to mention, I really didn't want my baby girl looking like a hillbilly with a knocked out tooth. Oh, daughter of mine, please stop hurting yourself! You are killing your mama with worry. Her surgery is on the 17th. Please pray she does okay with the anesthesia and that she doesn't kill herself before them.